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Monday, August 22, 2011

I Have Too Many Beautiful Women On Facebook As Friends

Just one more of the beautiful women on Facebook.
Part of being on Facebook is growing your list of friends. Facebook gives you suggestions: People You May Know. I don't know any of these people, but I click on a few every day. And I click on them especially if they're gorgeous women. After a while, though, I realized - I have too many beautiful women on Facebook as friends. (NOTE: I think I've reached the max on photos I can put on this post, otherwise it takes forever to load. If you'd like to see a Beautiful Women of Facebook 2, leave a comment.)

My main objective on Facebook is to attract readers to my blog. Or network with people in the writing/publishing/entertainment industries. I have real friends, people I actually know. But a lot of my friends came from the days of playing Mafia Wars. Along the way, the beautiful women of Facebook became my friends. Some have actually put in friend requests to me.

The problem with beautiful women is they spend most of their time being beautiful. They have to go to the gym and eat a salad; then, they get their nails done and their hair done; from there, they go to a photo shoot or a party; lots of pictures are taken and they upload them to Facebook; where they say hi to a few friends and repeat the process - being beautiful. I don't see where they have time to read my blog. I don't doubt that they can read because they all seem to have modeling or endorsement contracts. They had to read those. But my blog? HA!

When I see one of the beautiful women of Facebook uploading new photos, I have to look. My first thought is, "Boy is she NOT." That's right, NOT reading my blog. She just spent the last week being beautiful and she's off to another photo shoot, endorsement, taping of a TV commercial, or being eye candy at a party. Where is there time for There isn't.

I'm actually getting tired of all of the beautiful women on Facebook. I dug up 50 examples of what I have to endure. And they are really, really NOT reading my blog.

All of these pictures are verified. They're not fake profile pictures. Every one of these beautiful women on Facebook had hundreds of photos of themselves. I love great photography; so, I scanned their photo albums for the best, clearest shots. I hope you come to the conclusion that all of these beautiful women on Facebook are NOT. That's right, NOT reading my blog - they're spending all of their time being beautiful.

Beautiful women of Facebook - NOT reading my blog.
Beautiful women of Facebook - not reading my blog.
She is a good friend on Facebook and regularly reads my blog. YEAH!
Beautiful women of Facebook - probably not a blog reader.
Beautiful women of Facebook - too much time at the gym. No time for my blog.
She's a professional poker player. I don't write about poker.
Beautiful women of Facebook - all day at the pool. No time for me.
Beautiful women of Facebook - Lots of photo shoots.
Beautiful women of Facebook - Very busy being beautiful. No time for my blog.
My blog? Are you kidding. She's one of the beautiful women of Facebook.
She'll be too busy getting that paint off to read my blog.
Another beautiful woman of Facebook who isn't reading my blog.
She reads my blog and status updates. Even comments. One of the good ones.
They don't have time for my blog.

Do you see a laptop, an iPad or a Smartphone anywhere. How can she read my blog?
Reading a blog while driving in lingerie is dangerous.
Hard to read a blog when you're napping.
She has plenty of light, but no iPad or Laptop.
You don't get that beautiful sitting around reading my blog. That takes work.
She can't read my blog from that angle.
Another one of the beautiful women on Facebook who is busy being photographed.
Who worries about a blog at the pool? NO ONE. It's hard to read when you're drinking.
A great friend. She used to work for me. Incredible graphic designer. Loves my blog.
Busted, not reading my blog.
She doesn't have enough clothes on to read my blog. Clothing is required.
Beautiful women on Facebook don't read my blog. I'm telling you.
She's too pretty to worry about
This girl can read. She's had dozens of modeling contracts. But my blog? Puh!
Beautiful women on Facebook have lots of pictures of themselves. Most live in Las Vegas.
Do you think she's had time to bookmark NOT!
She's busy at another artsy photo shoot. No time for my blog.
She's not smiling because she just read one of my funny posts.
Beautiful women on Facebook spend a lot of time being beautiful. No time for me.
The sexier they are, the less likely they're typing in their browser,

I have a woman on Twitter from China and she retweets my tweets. But not her.

In the time it takes them to squeeze into those dresses, they could be reading my stuff.
Another one of the beautiful women on Facebook that doesn't have time for my blog.
She might read my blog. NO... who am I kidding?
I don't think you can see my blog through shades.
Another Beautiful Women On Facebook at the pool without my blog.
Unless the cameraman is holding an iPad with my blog on it, she's not reading.
Very busy being a Beautiful Woman on Facebook.
Might not speak English.
Too much gym time for this one to be reading my blog.
What did I say about babes at the pool?
She looks ready, but not to read.
"Hey, hey, hey... my blog is in front of you!!!!"
If she read my blog, she'd have that look on her face all the time. 
No time for my blog on the beach.
No electronics in the pool. She's not reading my blog. I'm sure of it.
I think she secretly wants to read my blog.
I bet she has an event to show up at looking beautiful.
She could read my blog, but there are more photos to be taken today. No time for my blog.
She's beautiful. But does she know I doubt it.
There is hope she has an iPad in that tent. She could do it. Go for it, babe.
Very hard to read my blog with shades on.
I know she has a computer. She's posted a ton of pictures on her profile. But what about me?
Again, not enough clothing to be a reader. You need to be fully clothed for my blog.
I guarantee she's not mesmerized by my blog.
That much lipstick leaves no time to read my blog.
She's a blogger. I've read her stuff. But mine? Doubt it.
A pair of pairs. Reading blogs is not on their itinerary.
What did I tell you about electronics by the pool.
I actually met this woman at a soul food restaurant. She doesn't read my blog.
Unless there is an iPad on the ceiling, she's not reading my blog.

As you can see, I have had to endure a lot. Only a couple of these beautiful women on Facebook are reading my blog. I need more normal people as friends. That's why I've come to the conclusion that I have too many beautiful women on Facebook as friends. Send me some ugly folks that like to read. 

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