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Friday, July 1, 2011

Friday, July 1, 2011 is Happy Canada Day - But WTF is it? Aye?

I wonder is she wants to see my Winnipeg?
Americans seem to get caught up in our own little world and don't pay much attention to the rest of the planet. To our north and south and overseas, American news is a regular part of their global updates. Henceforth, we in the lower 48 tend to be oblivious to what goes on elsewhere. Friday, July 1, 2011 is Happy Canada Day. But WTF is it? Aye?


Canadians had the same problem we had, they were a British colony. And from what I know about Canada, they hate scones and tea, too. It just took them a longer time to kick the people with the pasty skin and bad teeth out of their country. They also had another problem up north, the French were running the show.

However, in 1867, The British North American Act united Nova Scotia, New Brunswick and the Province of Canada, which was split into Ontario and Quebec. Today, the act is called the Constitution Act of 1867.

We Americans were quite resolute about getting the British out of our affairs and kicked their butts back to the Atlantic Ocean during the Revolutionary War. It all started for us on July 4th, 1776, when we said, GET OUT. And then there was a nice paper drawn up with a lot of signatures.

Canadians had to endure the British Empire sticking their hands in their pockets until 1982, when they finally cut ties and shipped the extra scones back to England.

In 1982, the original holiday, called Dominion Day, was renamed Canada Day, aye.

We love our neighbors to the north. They took in all of our draft dodgers in the 1960's, they provide us with illegal sources of generic pharmaceuticals and they invented hockey which has most of the professional teams based in U.S. cities. They also gave us Molson, Brador and Labatt - to name a few.

Canada is home to some of my favorite cities to visit in the world. I love the modern buzz of Toronto, the old part of Montreal and the elegance of Quebec City. Winnipeg is a wacky town, but WTF, it's cold there.

The best part about Canada for us, we share the longest border of any two countries in the world. Canadians are pretty happy up north. They stay there. You never hear stories about three guys in a caribou carcass sneaking across the border.

So, to salute our neighbors up north, go out and buy a good Canadian beer - they're all good - so you can't screw this up. Open it before 10 am and pour it on your cereal. Then, you can be just like a true Canadian.

Celebrate Friday, July 1, 2011 - Happy Canada Day - And you won't have to ask - WTF is it? Aye?

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