Male Genitalia Has Been Devalued. Obama Pledges Bailout.

Junk for sale. It's worth nothing these days.

When I was growing up, the spot between my legs was called "The Family Jewels" - now, kids refer to it as junk. Even a well polished pencil can't hold its value these days. Yes, male genitalia has been devalued, but President Obama pledges a bailout.

Wall Street has been limp lately and it is not due to the dropping dollar, America's male genitalia has been devalued and that's why trading on Wall Street has the charts pointing down.

President Obama said, "We cannot allow our jewels to remain at a junk rating. If the junk rating withstands over a long period of time, people will have no use for their junk and sell it. That could bring an end to the human race as we know it. It is our obligation as Americans to let our junk rise to the level it once was."

Fox News is all ready calling this a frivolous "Ballout" and MSNBC feels the junk status could bring Anthony Weiner back into the picture for a re-election bid.

"You can't even buy a hooker on craigslist anymore," said one angry junk dealer.

"Demand for junk has gone flat. I don't know what we're going to do," stated Hugh Hefner. "If junk can't rise, I'm out of business."

We don't have all the details on how the bailout would work, but it could put a huge bulge in the budget. For now our male genitalia has been devalued, but Obama pledges a bailout, unless there are stiff penalties for early withdrawal.

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