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Monday, September 20, 2010

Ohioans Most Interested in "Using A Vibrator"

OHow and why I find these things I'm not quite sure, but when I stumbled on this data, I had to share it. According to Google's Keyword Tool, since 2004 Ohioans lead the nation on searches for "using a vibrator".

OK, maybe I lied about the how and why of how I came across this information. I was using Google's Keyword Tool to search for topic ideas for future blogs and websites. I've been honing in on some ideas in the construction field and through the search I got bored. So, I ran off on a tangent about "orgasms", to see what the interest level in orgasms is on Google. Not as high as you'd think. I think more people are interested in jobs - hand or blow excluded.

Since orgasms didn't reverberate as high as I thought, I tried a search for "sex toys" and "sex aids". When you use Google's Keyword Tool, it returns related search terms. Ironically, the #1 related term that the tool produced was "god". You'd think it would be "Oh, God." But that's not what Google returned. The term "god" was followed by "toys", "penis", "vagina" and "insert".

Scrolling down the list of results, I ran across "using a vibrator". There is an icon next to the term that takes you to a set of graphs and charts so you can see how search terms are trending and where they are coming from. I selected the longest data range "2004-Present" and focused on the "United States". Over the last six years, Ohio tops the list for searches of "using a vibrator".

Ohio Tops Nation for Google Searches "using a vibrator" since 2004

Ohio is followed by Pennsylvania, Michigan, Missouri and New Jersey, to round out the top 5. All the states have high unemployment and this may be how the unemployed choose to spend their time in a bleak job market. 

Overall, "using a vibrator" searches were relatively flat up until 2009. This may have been due to weak batteries. Oddly, there has been a sudden rise in searches with a spike in July of 2009. Over the last year and a half, the trend has remained above the rather sideways range from 2004-2008. 

Trend of Google Searches for "using a vibrator" since 2004

Could this spike in trend have something to do with the current administration? Maybe after four or five months of the Obama administration's solutions to our economic woes Americans turned to sex as an escape and took matters into their own hands. Brings new meaning to "Yes We Can." 

Another coinciding trend was that there was an unusually large spike in searches for specific types of vibrators in February 2010. As an example, I've included the search trend charts below for "mini vibrator", "dolphin vibrator" and "strap on vibrator". 

Search Trends from Google's Keyword Tool September 2009-August 2010

These results are on a global basis. February 2010 is the month that stands out. Maybe a lot of women were frustrated with what they got for Christmas from their lovers. Or... Everyone in the northern hemisphere was in the throes of winter and this is how to cope with too much ice and snow. 

Oddly, in July and August of 2010 there was a surge in searches globally for "using a vibrator". 

Google Search Trends September 2009-Auguat 2010
Perhaps it took five to six months of fiddling around with the vibrators the world bought in February to finally hit the search engines and figure out how to use the darn things. 

Trying to dig a little deeper in my research, I checked for global trends in searches for batteries. That turned out to be a dead end, since battery searches has trended about the same over the term of September 2009-August 2010. However, down the list I ran across a sudden spike in searches for "iphone battery".

 Google Search Trends September 2009-August 2010

What can we draw from this correlation? Maybe vibrating iPhones were holding everyone over until the batteries started to head to battery heaven. After searching the Internet for iPhone battery replacements, hopeful vibrator users scoured their night stands and search engines for ways to get the real vibrators working. Who'd have thought that vibrators were next in line behind men and iPhones?

The objective of this article was not to point a finger or a vibrator at my fellow Buckeyes. Honestly, there was no point to this article. I was just surfing through Google's Keyword Tool and starting noticing things that stuck out. Then, I started trying to connect the dots. Maybe after reviewing the data you will come to a different conclusion.

NOTE: No pornography was viewed while researching this article. This was strictly a matter of science and statistics.   

In any event, if you're seeking a little sexual relief and you have to turn to a trusted device, you may want to contact your friends in Ohio when it comes to "using a vibrator" - they probably know.  


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